2nd Ultrasound for Hip is 10/29/2012

Norah's 2nd ultrasound is approaching....tomorrow. As it nears I get more nervous. This ultrasound will assess the progress of her hip while wearing the hip brace since birth. Since she had minimal damage to her hip and the Orthopedic felt confident that it was not severe, it's very possible that they may take the brace off. Poor little thing has had her legs and hips open 24/7 since birth. Imagine sitting frog-legged for 7 weeks. For a little while, I almost forgot about her condition (somewhat) but as Monday nears I find myself struggling with the tiniest things. My adorable niece had the cutest little silver, sparkly MaryJanes on yesterday and I couldn't help but feel envy and sadness about it. I dread the time when Norah sees a pair of shoes that she won't be able to wear. Of course I plan on buying her THEE most amazing pair of shoes when we do our first shoe lift, but it still isn't the same. Somehow bicycling came up in conversation yesterday with my husband and he said, " You know, I don't how she will be able to ride a bike." All these little things that don't seem to cross your mind right away....well now they do. All I want to do right now is have a pity party and all I can say is if you are a parent going through the same thing with your child reading our blog, let yourself do it. The best thing I have found to help me cope is to release it. Some days I release it in a positive way and I am hopeful and other days I release it with tears and fear. Either way, let it out. I am learning it just isn't possible to be "okay" with it. It's your child. I do believe there will come a time when I am accepting of it, but I don't think I will ever be okay, happy, or over it. For now I am just thankful that Mommy doesn't have to be so strong for her because she doesn't know the difference. Eventually she will realize what she has and at that point I know I will have to be strong for her. Until then....